Joshua Washington: Misdiagnosed schizophrenic on enough medications that aren't treating said illness to put a horse into a coma somehow tasked with leading a Normal Life despite this. It goes about as well for him as you'd expect.

[OOC]
Backtagging: Absolutely!
Threadhopping: I'm all for meeting new people and so the more the merrier.
Fourthwalling: Joshua's genre savvy so if we're doing Fourthwalling he'll be a little insufferable, just be aware. I don't tend to lean into it much.
Offensive subjects: I'm pretty open to most things, but I'd prefer anything that gets pretty hardcore violent or graphic be discussed oocly first so everyone knows what's comfortable. I'd also prefer to keep stuff like that in protected threads if possible, so other readers are warned/don't have to see it. Until Dawn is a VERY trigger heavy canon so please let Me know what to avoid.

Triggers that can come up around Joshua include but are not limited to: self-harm (multiple types), alcoholism, self-medication, suicide (ideation, urges, attempts), mental health issues, violence, death, cannibalism, emotional and physical torture, family neglect, parental abuse, internalized homophobia (mild, not often)

[IC]
Hugging this character: If in a social setting? Sure. If one on one? Probably not.
Kissing this character: Ditto.
Flirting with this character: He's probably doing it to you if you're all out together. Might as well join in!
Sex/relationship/shipping with this character: No except under special circumstances almost entirely locked by long term slowburn. I play Joshua as medically asexual because he's on such a strong cocktail of drugs that he has very low almost non existent libido.

He hides this by skipping medications before he hosts parties so he can appear to be more normal and engaging in suggestive behavior to keep up appearances. He has also taught himself how to kiss and give oral (either sex) so that if he likes someone he can still be the life of the party. Almost all of this is done is done without any sexual gratification or enjoyment on Joshua's part.

Special circumstance A: Chris Hartley is Joshua's longtime crush since they were kids. A lot of the above difficulties are still there but he's motivated to Make Things Work with Chris at the onset.

Special Circumstance B: If we gen RP and vibe and you're down with a Long, SLOW, slowburn? Can make things work.

This is NOT the character for you if you want healthy smut threads. I also play Joshua as Gay so if M/F interactions get mentioned he's playing up his Normal Guy persona. He's not publicly out about his sexual preferences, mostly owing to the fact he doesn't think it's relevant given his meds make acting on it almost impossible a lot of the time.

Ships: Chrises come at me obviously, but open to other canonmates as either one offs (party threads) or m/m for anything serious. Am cool with cross-canon as well.

NO to Dr. Hill.

Fighting with this character: Sure.
Injuring this character: Clear it with me and it's probably cool.
Killing this character: If it's a darker meme where Death is a very real option then sure, I'm no stranger to Joshua getting a Bad End AU but I prefer not to only play horror/dark threads.
Using telepathy/mind reading abilities on this character: LMAO Please. Look into his head. Management is not responsible for the horrors you encounter. Do so at your own risk.

Winter held Joshua's hands while he recovered. It drove away every distraction that would stop him from doing what it took to survive. It saved his life. When he was strong enough to climb out of the ravine he'd been thrown into it lead him to his first tracks in the snow. It gave him the cover he needed to secure his first kill.

Winter could not stay forever.

With it gone and Joshua once more in control of himself, things aren't as easy as they were. He often waits until the hunger gets to be maddening before he lets himself hunt. It's easier that way, keeps him from thinking about what he's doing. About clawed hands rending hide and sinew apart as sure as his fangs drew blood. If he thinks he hesitates. Ends up getting hurt and losing his meal. He's still getting used to all of this. He doesn't like it, but he's surviving.

It's the time spent in between hunts that's the worst. Time when his mind is brutally clear. He scrubs himself as clean as he can get in those moments. Laments over everything that's brought him here. The tiny shack in the woods he once used to call home has become so again. Still nothing more than four walls and a dirt floor but it's his. A place where he can retreat to when stronger hunters are nearby. A tiny territory all his own for him to claim.

It's lonely. It's hard. But it's home.

((Open to Josh's friends if they'd like to catch up with him.))

Now you know how it feels, Big Brother. Now you know how we felt, how afraid we were.

There's so much pain. He's tried calling out but he's too weak to be heard over the wind. Smears of his blood stain the ice and snow and the cold that once did nothing but sting and hurt is finally bringing some blessed numbness to broken bones. Joshua can barely move. His breath comes in raspy wheezes, far too shallow from the pain. He's bleeding out but slowly. While the snow bank he's fallen into protects him from the worst of the wind he's still encased in ice. He can't climb out. Can't even sit up.

At least while he's dying, he's not alone.

Hannah's peering down at him with needle like teeth stretched into an impossibly wide smile from where she's perched atop the snow. She sits with her unnaturally long legs bent outward at the knees. Her hair's coming out in rotting clumps. Josh can't look up properly to see her that well but he knows what his baby sister looks like. Looked. Looked like, before his friends set Blackwood Lodge ablaze. Beth's laying down next to him, her frozen fingers with bite marks bruising the skin poking and prodding at his injuries with a quiet fascination. Josh can see the maggots crawling out of the gaping wound in her neck that's long since bled dry.

You know, I don't even remember hitting the ground Big Brother. I was the lucky one. Dead on impact. You and Hannah though...always trying to hog the spotlight. Soon you'll be home. Here with us. Isn't that what you wanted all this time?

"Y...You're not...y'r not real." His vision's swimming and they flicker in and out of existence along with it. Does he want them gone right now of all times? Does Joshua Washington really want to die alone? He sobs out an exhale. It hurts to shake and yet his body can't seem to stop convulsing from the cold and his own fear. When he arrived in the Nexus three Winters ago it was from a dark dank cave much like this. Starving and alone. Near death.

Josh figured if he never left the Nexus he'd never have to face his fate.

Amid his hyperventilating and tears utterly alone he stops trying to raise his head and squeezes his eyes shut. Joshua is alone down here in the dark. Broken, bleeding, and so cold. Not even his hallucinations will hold his hands now.

A glimpse at the kind of work Joshua does when he's not at the cafe.



((Technically this thread all takes place before the nightmare event last Halloween however we JUST finally finished working on it so it's being posted now. Shoutouts to mynameisnotbrad for writing this with me!))

Winter and Joshua have a troubled relationship.

Crisp, cold air pricks the skin and practically invites busting out the flannel shirts and beanies. Year's end stands tall as a milestone, proof of another year he's made it. These are powerful things that Joshua loves about the season. They bring back so many fond memories of both family and friends. Of Christmases past and parties up at the family lodge on Blackwood Mountain.

The quiet that eats every other noise, devouring nature's sound until all that's left is a howling wind and your own thoughts is less agreeable. Josh's inner voices are too loud already and the quiet of winter does not help. For all the fond memories the season conjures it will be marred forever by the February two years ago when his sisters ran into the night of Blackwood Mountain and never returned. Every whisper of the wind could be Beth or Hannah's voice, asking why their big brother didn't save them.

There's a new terror that comes.

Shorter days mean longer nights, and night is when the Wendigo have power. Hunt. Feed. Hannah, little Hannah, had been one of them. The longer it takes for dawn to come gives the Wendigo more time to search, to hunt, to find people. Josh will never forget the milky eyes, gaunt misshapen horror of what was once a human body with its needle like teeth and razor sharp claws.

So of course it's past dusk when the first snow of the season comes down in the Nexus. Would it be wiser to hide away in bed with the covers drawn and drink until he blacked out? Like he'd done the night Beth And Hannah had--no. Joshua rolls down the sleeves of his flannel and zips up the puffy winter vest he likes to wear. It swishes in a high pitch whenever his sleeves brush against it while he digs out his thickest beanie and tugs it over his head. With hands in the pockets of his vest, Joshua walks outside and stares up at the snow.

It's the big wet flakes that are always on postcards. The couple of inches already on the ground are doing their job of eating up the sound all around him. He has never felt so alone as he is standing outside his front door staring up at the snow falling. It's crippling in its silent isolation that chokes the life from Joshua. Perhaps he cries. Perhaps it's just the snow melting against his face. But he stays out there for as long as he can stand it, green eyes watching the snow fall. Penance for not going after his sisters.

And hope, perhaps, that in this world between worlds he may hear their voices for real one day on the winter winds. Instead of only in his head.

Josh is making a real effort to try and get his life in order.

He's leaving his shanty more and more often, clean cut and wearing fresh clothes rather than the grimy tattered mess he'd arrived in months before. A few odd jobs around the Nexus have allowed him that much at least. They never last too long though. Partially because they're just that: odd jobs. But also, because one Bad Day or episode is all it takes to get him let go.

It's discouraging because Josh is trying so hard.

Not for himself, really. There's enough self loathing within him to bury him several times over. He hates himself. Hates what he's done. What he is. What he sees. But there are people he cares about, people who see something else that Josh doesn't.

People like Chris, like Dia. And like Han.

So when Josh's phone buzzes, he assumes it's one of the only people in this place who gives a shit about him, or the newest place he works at occasionally with some hours for him. He isn't wrong. Han wants to know if Josh is up for fixing up that rust heap he'd picked up a few weeks back. The memory makes Joshua smile as he unlocks his phone to reply.

Sure thing. Meet at your ship I'm assuming?

He doesn't wait for a reply when he leaves his shack. Josh figures he has plenty of time to change direction if need be. It's not half bad outside today anyway, and the walk will do him some good.